Tucker on Forgeover

Ship's Log: China Camp — Take One

Mon, 21 Feb 2011 22:05:54 +0000

I am super King Kamehameha bushed; just completely wiped out from an overflowing fun (as Ruby would say) weekend. So I’m going to cheat and give you a little photo essay. Hopefully, one of the family or I will come back and fill in the details.

In the meantime, check out these beautiful photos.

A dozen ways to make good friends

Fri, 19 Nov 2010 21:24:30 +0000

Say hello to a stranger on the street. If they look interesting and willing to chat walk with them up the block. Tucker met Andrea in Vermont many years ago this way and we had such a great time with her.

Make friends with a friend of a friend. You see someone at a friend’s party and then the next one and so on. At some point, have dinner with the friend of the friend and see what happens.

15 Years

Thu, 18 Nov 2010 20:33:16 +0000

Fifteen years ago today Victoria drove a borrowed truck, with her limited possessions into Brattleboro, Vermont to join me on what would be our first, longest, and most significant adventure together. I can still feel the crisp chill of the pre-winter air as I chatted nervously with one of the local crazies and awaited her arrival.

Separated by hundreds of miles, without money or transportation, our relationship had just barely survived what we now know to have been its darkest hour. In the weeks preceding her arrival we had actually split up. Our friends, family, and advisors were in accord that our love was destined for disaster. We knew with unflappable, unassailable conviction that there was something about the other that we needed to explore, to know, and to grow from. This confidence and desire to grow together, it turns out, has been the foundation of our relationship.

Photo Highlights: Santa Cruz Cruise

Thu, 28 Oct 2010 15:41:22 +0000

Home

Fri, 22 Oct 2010 23:46:45 +0000

I wasn’t at home when we were tied into slip A58 in Monterey Harbor. I was homesick. Surprising yes, since I was on my own boat, tied up with my usual dock lines, cooking in my own galley, and sleeping in my own bed. I spent my time in Monterey constantly checking the three forecast areas on NOAA to find our perfect weather window to head north. Again, I was surprised at myself. The trip north is usually hard, wet, and cold. Our boat is in great shape and we could actually (foolishly) cash in Tucker’s retirement accounts and head south for at least a year. I always want to go south, or anywhere warmer than wherever I am. But I wanted to go north, to go home.

The first day of the unschool year

Mon, 23 Aug 2010 22:59:16 +0000

I noticed on facebook today that many of my friend’s kids were dressed in fresh new clothes with hair and teeth brushed. Ruby and Olive weren’t actually all that bad considering they had a shower just yesterday (showering when you don’t have one of your own can be a little more of an adventure). When we went out for the morning I decided to drag along Tucker’s good camera to snap a few shots of our first day, and what a beautiful day it was. We had sun and warmth starting in the morning and lasting until evening. Ruby came home from swimming lessons after 6 without wearing her winter hat. Remarkable! Here’s why I’m glad I didn’t send my daughter to school again today.

Ship's Log: August 20-22

Mon, 23 Aug 2010 22:55:34 +0000

Victoria, Ruby, Olive, Jacob, Kate, Michael, and I left the dock at Emery Cove around noon on Friday for a 2 night stay at Alaya Cove, Angel Island. We’ve made this trip twice before but never with company. I decided to fill up the third tank (for an alleged total of 110 galons) just in case. We did our shopping the night before and got everything ship shape early on Friday morning for our guest’s 9am arrival. As expected it took a few hours to get Kate and her family moved in, and we took the opportunity to shower and pack a few more last minute maintenance tasks in.

Pink Jobs & Blue Jobs

Mon, 09 Aug 2010 09:07:10 +0000

A few weeks ago I was lamenting to Victoria how we seem to have fallen right back into traditional gender roles in our household. It should not have come as a surprise to me, what with Vick being a stay at home mom, but after many years of mixing and matching roles based on personal strengths rather than gender roles, I was somewhat irked by our lapse into traditionalism.

Bringing Her Home

Mon, 17 May 2010 20:40:53 +0000

**** The plan was to meet Allison in Richmond at 9:00 and shuttle the ManVan back to Emeryville where we would pick Jon up and drive back to Richmond. Unfortunately the ManVan had other ideas. Somehow, after hauling a ton of gear over 700 miles, the ManVan decided to give up the ghost right in the Bay Marine parking lot.

So, we changed the plan. By 10am everyone was on the boat and by 11 we were pushing off. After a hair raising shove off we headed out the channel and into the Bay. The wind was gentle in the morning and we put up full sails but by the time we were lined up with Racoon Straights it was blowing hard enough to warrant a first reef. By the time we were lining up with the Gut it was howling and a second reef would have been prudent. I was loving the speed (6.5 SOG according to the iPhone) and we were so close to Emeryville that it was nearly time to douse the sails anyway, so we let out a bit and enjoyed the wind.

Bad Neighbors

Sat, 24 Apr 2010 15:20:40 +0000

Back in our wild youth we had this neighbor (Douglas Robbins) who was getting into producing documentaries. Before he moved on he made this video staring (amongst others) us. In case you don’t know by watching, its farcical… though Vick can make 16 different muffins without processed flour.

Feeling Inspired

Mon, 08 Mar 2010 21:12:43 +0000

Despite the boat related disappointment this weekend I’ve found myself unexpectedly inspired, motivated, and empowered these last two days. Vick linked me up to the blog of a nomadic family (Happy Janssens) last night, and I kinda went link crazy, hopping around to a bunch of similar blogs. These families’ stories have been a balm on my chapped spirit. This morning the kids and I sat around watching videos from various blogs showing their kids living happy, nomadic, unschooling lives. True our adventure is just where we left it on Friday, but somehow we all feel closer to it.

Catalina: New Year's Eve

Fri, 01 Jan 2010 08:05:26 +0000

Yesterday we went out for a pleasure sail. We sailed out of Catalina Harbor in the morning and puttered around the Outer Santa Barbara Channel. The wind was promising when we left the harbor. It had been assaulting our transom all night, smacking the harbor against the hull loudly enough that we almost turned the boat on our mooring.

By the time we got under sail the wind died. This has been the great frustration of sailing here. We can see wind on the ocean all around but wherever we are seems to be becalmed. Since we didn’t have any destination I wasn’t inclined to turn on the engine. We just wallowed, boom creaking in the light puffs of wind that would occasionally grace us. Our speed over water was 0 knots for at least an hour.

The Blue Bunny — Olive' First (collaborative) Story

Wed, 25 Nov 2009 22:58:50 +0000

We had a really first rate dinner at Amber tonight. When we arrived (at 5:15), there was one other family there and we were seated in the very back corner of the room reserved for families with little kids that look like trouble. Ruby was wearing her pink flower rain boots, mini-skirt, and a blue tee-shirt. Olive was sporting the ripped play pants and a dinosaur shirt. I really can’t blame them for seating us in the back corner, and it did nothing to dampen our enjoyment of the meal. The waitstaff positively doted over Olive. She played it cool, not answering their questions, but turning around to gawk at them when they walked away.

Yo Ho Ho Ho

Mon, 23 Nov 2009 10:25:39 +0000

We’ve really needed a relaxing family vacation for a while, and with time counting down to the big trip, we also need to make sure that the family is up for extended sailing. Last night, after weeks of thinking about these two items individually a plan popped into my head that married both of these concerns into a harmonic union.

This morning I asked Ruby if she would like to go sailing for the week after Christmas. She asked a bunch of probing questions – “Can I bring my dolls?” and “What will we do about pirates” – and when she was satisfied with the answers, wholeheartedly supported the plan.

TED India and Beyond

Tue, 08 Sep 2009 22:47:28 +0000

While I was on vacation, I received word that I had been invited to be a guest at TED India 2009. Tonight I completed the registration and made it official. My tickets are purchased and plans are being laid.

When I mentioned to my dad that I was almost certainly going to India, he told me that he had always wanted to go and got this far away look in his eye. I instantly extended an invitation to him, hoping that he would accept, but aware that it was a big lift for him. I was happily surprised when my Mom started to encourage him and he gradually agreed that this was the chance of a lifetime. Of course my parents have this habit of dreaming about things in a way that looks to outsiders like resolve, so I was optimistically skeptical until last week when we bought our plane tickets.

East Coast Family Vacation 2009

Fri, 04 Sep 2009 12:33:41 +0000

We just returned from a truly wonderful vacation. I took the family back East (Boston, Portland, Round Pond) for almost the whole month of August. We saw most of our family, got to welcome baby Jacob into the world, and many of our oldest friends.

It was a true vacation in every sense. The children both came into their own. Ruby, discovering her roll in our family (nuclear and extended), found her inner sweetness (best self) and showed an unexpected degree of maturity, self reliance, and empathy. This was best expressed when she was shepherding her sister around, pointing out dangers, explaining tricks and relationships, and helping her get her needs met.

Fixed Login Problem

Fri, 04 Sep 2009 12:17:37 +0000

I’ve received a few complaints lately regarding the gallery login. If you’ve tried to log in to see the photos, and found yourself redirected to a Profile Page, you will be pleased to hear that this problem has been “fixed”. The default behavior now will be to redirect you back to the home page where you can easily click on the gallery link again. Sorry for all of the confusion.

Being Your Best Self

Tue, 07 Jul 2009 22:24:22 +0000

I’m a crunchy, touchy feelie, hippie parent. As such its often hard to come up with just the right words to tell your kid that biting her mom and laughing about it makes you wildly, furiously, and deeply unhappy. As a hippie, touchy feelie, AP, parent you are not, for example supposed to say “Do that again and you’re out of the family.” Nor is it encouraged to shout “Are you insane?” It’s just not the thing. Conversely the suggested mantras “Biting is not okay” and “We don’t bite sweetie,” just don’t really satisfy the deep, furious, wild feelings that are floating around the house at such moments.

Father's Day @ Hidden Villa

Sat, 27 Jun 2009 21:38:05 +0000

I started out the day, as I do most every Sunday, with the Coffee Social. Since the kids are finally over the chicken-pox we had a great turnout, and I got to spend most of the morning lounging around with coffee, chocolate crossiants, and friends. Early naps provided a little needed excuse to read more of my latest addiction .

Somewhere around 4 we packed up our things and headed over to Hidden Villa for the Banana Slug String Band’s Annual Father’s Day concert. I don’t know why I love this event so much. Maybe its sitting on the most lucious green organic lawn in the world, embraced by mountains all around. Maybe its the huge jar of margaritas Vick brought. Perhaps its the happy kids (myself included) running around without a care in the world. Whatever it is, I really look forward to this event. Every year I meet a couple of other dads that seem genuinely happy to be fathers.

Personal Philanthropy

Wed, 03 Jun 2009 08:57:06 +0000

I was talking with one of my fellow Akidoists last week about how much trouble he has had raising money for the Aids Ride. We speculated that, with the downturn in economy people are giving less. I started to wonder about this (aloud of course), and kept thinking about it afterward.

As Chris Guillebeau points out many times on his website, if you are reading this, you are likely very rich. You are in fact, likely to find yourself in the top 1-10% of the worlds richest people. Regardless of how you feel about economic equity it is more likely than not that you’ll agree that we at the peak of the wealth pyramid are standing atop a wide base. That base supports us in ways that I can scarcely comprehend, but in many ways it needs our support as well.

Parenting: What I've learned so far

Thu, 23 Apr 2009 21:46:41 +0000

Basically, what I’ve learned so far boils down to this. Parenting is not so much about managing your children, as it is about managing yourself. For example, in our family the kids wake up every morning (in the winter) at 6:30. 6:30 wake up calls make me a bit grumpy, so I could either: a) yell at the kids to leave me alone or; b) go to sleep earlier so that I’m not so tired at 6:30.

Productivity: The One Pen Challenge

Tue, 21 Apr 2009 22:46:01 +0000

A few weeks ago at our Coffee Social, a friend needed to write something down. Paper is everywhere in our house, so that was easy to come by. He naturally reached over and grabbed my fountain pen, which was sitting on the table beside him. I (too) quickly snatched my pen back and then gently explained that the nib of a fountain pen is a very personal thing, blah blah blah. We then confonded our guests and caused a bit of a stir when we had trouble locating another writing device. Eventually we resolved the problem by borrowing a marker or crayon from Ruby.

Secret Garden

Sun, 05 Apr 2009 07:44:23 +0000

Victoria and I built a secret garden in our back “yard” yesterday. Vick has been talking about this for a few weeks/months now and the weather and my new found productivity finally converged in a favorable way. I can’t wait to see what it looks like in bloom.

Losing Carma

Wed, 01 Apr 2009 20:11:17 +0000

Tonight I said goodbye to Kristy our hair stylist of 10 years. It was – oddly – the hardest thing I’ve done in quite a while. Carma Hair Company is in San Bruno, a one hour drive during rush hour. We have been commuting between thirty minutes and one hour for about seven years, and it just got to be too much to justify. What we’re saying goodbye to is a salon that treats its customers like extended family, and the easy comfort of a big thanksgiving dinner. I’m going to miss the playful banter, what-ifs and did-you-hears that every trip promised. Goodbye Carma, I hope to be back someday!