Tucker

We just returned from a truly wonderful vacation. I took the family back East (Boston, Portland, Round Pond) for almost the whole month of August. We saw most of our family, got to welcome baby Jacob into the world, and many of our oldest friends. It was a true vacation in every sense. The children both came into their own. Ruby, discovering her roll in our family (nuclear and extended), found her inner sweetness (best self) and showed an unexpected degree of maturity, self reliance, and empathy. This was best expressed when she was shepherding her sister around, pointing out dangers, explaining tricks and relationships, and helping her get her needs met. ...

I’ve received a few complaints lately regarding the gallery login. If you’ve tried to log in to see the photos, and found yourself redirected to a Profile Page, you will be pleased to hear that this problem has been “fixed”. The default behavior now will be to redirect you back to the home page where you can easily click on the gallery link again. Sorry for all of the confusion. ...

I’m a crunchy, touchy feelie, hippie parent. As such its often hard to come up with just the right words to tell your kid that biting her mom and laughing about it makes you wildly, furiously, and deeply unhappy. As a hippie, touchy feelie, AP, parent you are not, for example supposed to say “Do that again and you’re out of the family.” Nor is it encouraged to shout “Are you insane?” It’s just not the thing. Conversely the suggested mantras “Biting is not okay” and “We don’t bite sweetie,” just don’t really satisfy the deep, furious, wild feelings that are floating around the house at such moments. ...

I started out the day, as I do most every Sunday, with the Coffee Social. Since the kids are finally over the chicken-pox we had a great turnout, and I got to spend most of the morning lounging around with coffee, chocolate crossiants, and friends. Early naps provided a little needed excuse to read more of my latest addiction . Somewhere around 4 we packed up our things and headed over to Hidden Villa for the Banana Slug String Band’s Annual Father’s Day concert. I don’t know why I love this event so much. Maybe its sitting on the most lucious green organic lawn in the world, embraced by mountains all around. Maybe its the huge jar of margaritas Vick brought. Perhaps its the happy kids (myself included) running around without a care in the world. Whatever it is, I really look forward to this event. Every year I meet a couple of other dads that seem genuinely happy to be fathers. ...

I was talking with one of my fellow Akidoists last week about how much trouble he has had raising money for the Aids Ride. We speculated that, with the downturn in economy people are giving less. I started to wonder about this (aloud of course), and kept thinking about it afterward. As Chris Guillebeau points out many times on his website, if you are reading this, you are likely very rich. You are in fact, likely to find yourself in the top 1-10% of the worlds richest people. Regardless of how you feel about economic equity it is more likely than not that you’ll agree that we at the peak of the wealth pyramid are standing atop a wide base. That base supports us in ways that I can scarcely comprehend, but in many ways it needs our support as well. ...

Basically, what I’ve learned so far boils down to this. Parenting is not so much about managing your children, as it is about managing yourself. For example, in our family the kids wake up every morning (in the winter) at 6:30. 6:30 wake up calls make me a bit grumpy, so I could either: a) yell at the kids to leave me alone or; b) go to sleep earlier so that I’m not so tired at 6:30. ...

A few weeks ago at our Coffee Social, a friend needed to write something down. Paper is everywhere in our house, so that was easy to come by. He naturally reached over and grabbed my fountain pen, which was sitting on the table beside him. I (too) quickly snatched my pen back and then gently explained that the nib of a fountain pen is a very personal thing, blah blah blah. We then confonded our guests and caused a bit of a stir when we had trouble locating another writing device. Eventually we resolved the problem by borrowing a marker or crayon from Ruby. ...

Victoria and I built a secret garden in our back “yard” yesterday. Vick has been talking about this for a few weeks/months now and the weather and my new found productivity finally converged in a favorable way. I can’t wait to see what it looks like in bloom.

Tonight I said goodbye to Kristy our hair stylist of 10 years. It was – oddly – the hardest thing I’ve done in quite a while. Carma Hair Company is in San Bruno, a one hour drive during rush hour. We have been commuting between thirty minutes and one hour for about seven years, and it just got to be too much to justify. What we’re saying goodbye to is a salon that treats its customers like extended family, and the easy comfort of a big thanksgiving dinner. I’m going to miss the playful banter, what-ifs and did-you-hears that every trip promised. Goodbye Carma, I hope to be back someday!